Which type of teacher are you?

Ever wondered what type of teacher you are or need to know who you are working with? Read our list and let us know in the comments.

The Content Driven

Love to learn more and more about your subject

Have you read the syllabus from front to back? Know every dot point off by heart? Written your own textbook and scrutinise every other text? Do you spend hours researching, collecting, and analysing a topic? Feel like you are at the forefront of your subject and no one knows “this stuff” like you? Then you are the Content Driven teacher.

The Passionate

Is teaching like your everything?

You were born to teach. You watch movies about teachers. Your classroom is a shrine to teaching. In your spare time, you teach or read about teaching. You follow every teacher or teaching group on social media. Not to be confused with The Instagrammer, The Passionate teacher models themselves on the work they do, not others. If your school holidays are spent at school, then you’re type is right here, but you already knew that.

The Whirlwind

Do you cause chaos in every classroom

You know this one. They enter the room and forget why. Students never receive their marks or tasks. Assignments are given out last minute and projects are never completed. One wall has some falling down or old posters or pictures and the others are blank. Desks and chairs are never in the same position. They have to go through piles of paper to find anything. Do you forget where you are up to with your class each day, have a diary but not sure where you put it or your students' marks? Then you’re a Whirlwind, my friend.

The BFF

Want to be everyone's friend

Often confused with The Hugger, the Best Friend wants every student to be their mate. They love to gossip, sit close, and be involved with everything the students do. Ever been upset when students had a party and you weren’t invited? Say “hello” to every teacher and student? Or is Monday morning spent going over what happened on the weekend...with students and teachers? Then you’re a students’ BFF.

The Genius

Know everything and they know nothing

Linked quite nicely with the Content Driven teacher type, The Genius takes it all too far. In fact, they are a super freak. Their subject knowledge is way beyond the course requirements. Is your love for the subject greater than your love for teaching? Are you on the brink of a major discover within your field and upset that students don’t have the same passion as you for it? Did Stephen Hawkins have you on speed dial? I would tell you that you are a Genius, but you're probably wouldn’t be reading this article anyway.

The CV

Taking everyone alive?

The CV does everything for their resume regardless of the fallout. They are going places and you can either go with them, like The Coat Tailor, or you can get the F%$@* out of the way. The CV knows how to manipulate and delegate to get what they want, and then take the credit at the end. You know the one because everything they do “is in the students’ best interests”. Everything they do only lasts a few weeks and then they let someone else take over. You don’t want to be the CV type!

The Dictator

Mrs Trunchbowl your idol?

Your class, your subject, your rules. Students enter your room quietly, some out of respect and others out of fear. Not a sound is heard during the lesson except pen on paper. Students know to never ask to go to the toilet or speak unless spoken to. Every word and action is like a cane to the students. You run a classroom better than any army ever could.

The Ghost

Hardly ever there?

Definitely not a teacher type you want to be, The Ghost is never there. They always duck out of the room for a second and never come back. They use up every holiday, sick day, moving day, carers day as soon as they can. They are never seen during major events, report writing, parent teacher or staff meetings, despite one or two admitting to having seen them once from the corner of their eye when the light was just right. The Ghost leaves early, comes late, and is regularly never seen on a Friday or Monday.

The Close Talker

Nothing speaks better than a bad breath close talker

Seinfeld devoted an entire episode to the “Close Talker” for good reason as they are always in your personal space when talking to you. The close talker is sometimes the same as The Hugger and/or The BFF. They sit on the students’ desk or sit right beside them to be as close as they can when answering question. To top it off, the close talker usually has coffee and/or tuna breath. Even walking and talking is hard to get away from The Close Talker

The Hugger

Can't leep your hands to yourself

We can’t call them “The Toucher” for obvious reasons, but The Hugger is always high fiving, fist bumping, throwing an arm around, head touching etc. Quite often as part of being a Close Talker or trying to be the BFF, they love to “comfort” students. The Hugger doesn’t always pick up on student or teacher body language as they try to pull away. The Hugger means nothing by it, it’s just their nature. They talk with their out of school friends the exact same way.

The Coat Tailor

Always feel like number 2?

Do you volunteer for everything a certain teacher always puts forward? Is your teacher buddy a CV? Do you do all the work, get just enough kudos for your efforts but always get passed up when the transfers and higher duties come around? The Coat Tailor or Wingman hangs onto the coat of the CV teacher who is going places and hopes to join them. Unfortunately, they never seem to make it through that glass ceiling.

The Motivator

Tony Robbins is your hero

If “come on”, “you can do it”, “give it a try”, or “I believe in you” are some of your favourite phrases, then you are the Motivator. Is your room full of inspirational quotes? Do you believe anyone can achieve anything if they only believed in themselves? Is your screen wallpaper a Tony Robbins quote? Does pumping up others drive you as well? Hate to see someone say no? You’ve found your type.

The Jargonator

Buzz words are your friend

Ever learned a new language? The Jargonator has. They know every educational abbreviation, acronym, and buzzword. The Jargonator can often be combined with The Politician because they never answer a question directly or in a way anyone understands. If pedagogical discourse about growth mindset and the effect size of self evaluation rolls off your tongue like water, then you’re type is easy to pick. Do teachers walk away from your conversation with a confused or baffled look on their face? Welcome to finding your niche as The Jargonator.

The Politician/Unionist

Can't ever pick the crowd

Do you talk in circles and never actually answer a question? Do you use big words when little ones will suffice? Can’t quite read your audience? Or are you the one always screaming out “strike” when the staffroom runs out of coffee or the toner is gone in the photocopier? Have you bailed up every new teacher in the school with union forms or attend every rally irrelevant to what it is about? You already know who you are.

The Instagrammer

Does your teaching live on line?

A new breed of teacher slowly emerging over the last few years, The Instagrammer is all over social media. They post photos of their classrooms, or their latest purchases, or of students doing work and blur their faces with cute little emojis. The Instagrammer uses not only the school's communication system with parents but every other one available as well. Who knows if they do any work, but with all those filters and stickers, they sure look that way (although not as lazy as the Clipboard Teacher).

The Full Metal Jacket

Always in the student's grill?

Usually reserved for PE teachers, you know if you’re a Full Metal Jacket. Not to be confused with The Dictator, they yell and scream to get anything done. They choose a student an just hammer away for the entire lesson. It doesn’t matter the age group or student needs, they will push every student to the limit. This teacher gets students ready to join the defense forces.

The Techie

Double monitors are your thing

Printer broken? Laptop not working? Need to add graphs to your spreadsheet? The Techie is your go to teacher for anything that uses electricity, batteries, or a keyboard. Their entire course is online with self marking quizzes and tests, you can’t see them behind their dual monitors, and they control it all from their phone. If your students need to download an app just to enter the room then you have found your Teacher type.

The Clipboard

Looking busy is harder than working

Everyone knows if you carry a clipboard people think you’re busy, even if there’s nothing on it. This teacher always walks on a mission, carries papers, stands up when it looks like work is coming...so they can run away. The Clipboard teacher is never busy but sure looks it. They’ll walk to staff rooms instead of calling, say “phew” a lot and generally shuffle papers to make others think they have a huge workload. I mean, you’re reading this on your work computer with papers spread out over your desk and your finger on the “minimise” button. Go grab a clipboard!

The Linesman

Whatever they do ends in lines on the board

Ever watched the opening scene of The Simpson’s with Bart writing on the blackboard? Was that the best part of the show? Did it have you wondering what new lines you could get the kids to do the next day? Late to class? That’s lines. Talking in class? That’s lines. Didn't finish your work? That’s lines. Breathing funny? That’s lines. Cleared your throat? You bet that’s lines. Need to teach literacy? Get the pens and lined paper out kids because your teacher is a linesman!

The White Rabbit

Always late to class...or everything?

“I’m late. I’m late” said the White Rabbit and so does this teacher. Do you turn up to work after the bell? Do your students clap when you make it to class only 10 minutes late? or enter the classroom with a mouthful of food? Even with bells, clocks, and watches you struggle to get anywhere within the needed time frame? then you’re a White Rabbit.

The Talker

Does anyone listen?

Every student who doesn’t want to do work loves The Talker because they are easily distracted and never get work done. The Talker thinks that they are lecturing, only students never actually write down any notes. Can you talk underwater with a mouthful of marbles? Does the bell go before students get out their books? When you tell the students “we talked about this last week” do they give you a blank look? Then you obviously talk too much.

 

How did you go? Did you find your type? Are we missing any? Let us know in the comments.